New Mom Furious After Husband Says He’s ‘Helping’ By Doing Standard Parenting Tasks

A new mom says her husband often neglects parenting duties and, when he does do things like feed the baby, he lets her know he’s “just trying to help” her.

In a post shared to Reddit, she writes, “Apparently my husband is ‘helping me’ raise our kids. And this whole time I thought we were equal partners. Joke’s on me.”

“Long story short, I have done all but 5 wake ups since my 5 month old was born,” she continues. “My husband and I both work — I work 5 days and he works 3.5.”

One recent night, she writes, she was “exhausted,” and asked her husband if he would help out.

“I went to my husband at 10 pm and said, ‘Hey, it would have been nice if you offered to take the baby tonight since you’re not working tomorrow and I am so tired I think I’m going to die. And also, you’re staying up with the baby tonight,'” she writes. “He claims he was just on the way to ask me if I wanted him up with the baby anyway. (I would bet my life that wasn’t the case.) Whatever. There are two bottles in the fridge, have fun.”

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However, that night, he woke her up at 4 a.m. “with a crying baby” because the little one was hungry again. While he had fed the infant a bottle around 1 a.m., he was unsure what to do since she needed more food.

“What about her second bottle?” the mom asked. “He forgot. If I had died in my sleep my final words would’ve been, ‘There are two bottles already made in the fridge.’ Not to mention he could’ve, IDK, used his legs to walk to the freezer and get more.”

Now, she writes, “he’s mad that I’m mad,” and says he was “just trying to help me.”

“Hell no. Help me? Help me?!???? I’m done,” she writes. “I’ll help his sorry self with whatever he explicitly lays out for me (and maybe conveniently forget a few things here or there). But I’m not holding his hand and single handily keeping this household going by myself anymore. Forget it.”

Other Reddit users are weighing in, with many commiserating.

“Ugh married single moms are everywhere. Sounds like you need to let him sink or swim,” one user wrote. “And he shouldn’t ask you if you want him to do it one night. He should just say he’s doing it and then, do the whole thing. Instead of this whole dance, why don’t you just make a schedule? These are your nights, these are mine. Do not wake me up under any circumstances. Godspeed.”

Another added, “I used to have to remind my ex that he wasn’t bathing the kids or doing the dishes for me. Those are his kids too and he also ate off those dishes. Doing things for me would be washing my car or filling up my tank. We are divorced. I don’t think he ever got it.”