All About Mariska Hargitay and Peter Hermann’s Relationship

Mariska Hargitay and Peter Hermann met in a classic Hollywood way — on the set of a TV show.

In 2002, Hermann made his first appearance on Law & Order: SVU, which Hargitay had been starring in for three years. They connected while working together, went on a church date and got married two years later.

Throughout their marriage, the Law & Order star and the Younger actor have supported each other’s work and appeared together at numerous red carpet events, including the Cannes Film Festival in May 2025 alongside their three children: August, Andrew and Amaya.

“My husband is my North Star, and my kids are my teachers … Together we’re just this whole, happy, joyful, chaotic, crazy unit,” Hargitay told PEOPLE in March 2018. “I’ve never known anything that was more right.”

She added that although she and Hermann are “so different,” it’s been “amazing how we complement each other.”

Here’s everything to know about Mariska Hargitay and Peter Hermann’s relationship.

They first bonded on the set of Law & Order: SVU

Hargitay has starred as Detective Olivia Benson in Law & Order: SVU since 1999. She met Hermann when he guest-starred as defense attorney Trevor Langan in a season 3 episode titled “Monogamy.”

When Hargitay appeared on The Drew Barrymore Show in January 2022, she recalled meeting her husband for the first time and thinking, “Who is that Clark Gable, Superman guy that I need to marry today?” She admitted she was nervous and tried to flirt with him by making a joke, but it didn’t land.

“He was very handsome and it was a distraction,” Hargitay admitted. “I’d never been like that to anyone ever.”

Hargitay “sobbed” during their first date

After working together, Hermann invited Hargitay to join him for a church service.

In June 2019, the Law & Order star told PEOPLE that going on that church date with her now-husband was like “getting hit with a lightning bolt.”

“I just started sobbing,” she recalled. “Peter thought I was crying because I was so moved by the service. No, it was because I was just overwhelmed, realizing he was the one.”

Following the church service, Hargitay confided in a close friend, saying, “This is it. This is the man I’m going to marry.”

During an appearance on Today that same month, the actress explained why she got so emotional during their first date.

“I cried because I was feeling something that I’d never felt before,” she said. “When you’re a little girl, your parents and your grandparents and everyone goes, ‘When you’re in love, you’ll know.’ And I did.”

She added, “And before I did I’d never felt that.”

Hargitay and Hermann got married in 2004

The actors exchanged vows in 2004 in Santa Barbara, Calif., surrounded by 200 guests celebrating their special day.

“We got married and we knew that it was going to be good,” Hargitay told PEOPLE in June 2019. “We sort of knew that we found the right one.”

The actress went on to say she “never thought it could be this good,” adding, “I waited and married the right one and it’s better than I thought it was. Because sometimes you take a snapshot and you go, ‘I can’t believe this is my life.’ ”

For Hermann, it was during Hargitay’s 40th birthday celebration that he realized she was the one.

“I actually saw Mariska with all of the people that she loved around her,” he remembered. “It was like seeing this person who was now in the soil … which was this abundance of people and this abundance of love and I thought, ‘I want to be part of that soil.’ ”

Hargitay and Hermann are parents to three children

Hargitay and Hermann share three kids: two sons, August Miklos Friedrich and Andrew Nicolas, and a daughter, Amaya Josephine.

They welcomed their first son, August, on June 28, 2006.

“Nobody wanted to be pregnant more than me,” Hargitay told SELF magazine in January 2007. “From the minute I found out, I was wearing full-on maternity pants. My stomach was totally flat, mind you, but I was just so excited.”

Several years later, the couple adopted their daughter, Amaya, in April 2011. “I’m deliriously happy,” Hargitay told PEOPLE at the time. “From the minute she was born, she was just surprisingly alert and so full of love.”

Six months later, the actors adopted their younger son, Andrew. Hargitay shared with PEOPLE at the time that they “never in a million years thought it would happen this quickly, but something inside of us knew that this was right.”

She added, “We knew this was our guy. Everything about it felt right. It felt divinely right.”

Hargitay and Hermann made a red carpet appearance with their children at the Cannes Film Festival in May 2025. The actress was there to celebrate the premiere of her directorial debut, My Mom Jayne.

They’ve said the secret to their marriage is laughter

During their June 2019 conversation with PEOPLE, Hermann said that the secret to their long-lasting marriage was simple: laughter.

“I never thought I would have this much laughter in my life,” he said, emphasizing, “Not just actual laughter. But also the way that Mariska is just the embodiment of laughter — of joy.”

Hermann explained that laughter is how they “find [their] way back” to each other.

“It’s this fantastically, wonderfully ridiculous way that we can swing back and forth any number of times in any given day,” he said. “But fundamentally we know we have the same destination.”

Hargitay and Hermann often share their support for one another

The actors aren’t shy about celebrating each other’s projects on social media.

When Hermann published his first children’s book, If the S in Moose Comes Loose, in 2018, Hargitay congratulated him on Instagram.

“As the wordsmith himself puts it, this book is a ‘Madcap spelling romp’… who says that?” she wrote in the caption. “Only my brilliant husband. My brilliant AUTHOR husband, whom I’m so ‘ridiculously excited + very proud’ of.”

And the support goes both ways. When Law & Order: SVU season 22 premiered in May 2020, Hermann posted on X to celebrate the occasion.

“Here’s looking at you @mariska!” he wrote, alongside a photo of Hargitay smiling through a window. “Congrats on tonight’s premiere of Season 22—TWENTY-TWO!!!!—of @nbcsvu.”

He added, “You’re the enduring backbone, determined heart and bright, shining spirit who makes it all possible. I love you, I’m so proud of you…. and your smile just slays me.”

Their marriage “keeps getting better”

During a January 2024 appearance on Today, Hargitay opened up about how she and Hermann keep their marriage “fresh.”

“I’m at a point in my life where it just keeps getting better with him,” she reflected, also noting that every marriage has ups and downs. “I’ve learned so much.”

“Peter always says this beautiful quote about … breaking through marriage into marriage,” she said on the show. “And that is what I think we’ve lived because at this time in my life, I feel very different than I have for the last maybe 15 or 18 — and I feel [assured] up in our love.”