Woman Questions Decision to Reject Sweet Guy for This Reason

A single woman is reassessing her dating requirements after rejecting a “perfectly sweet guy” due to not feeling “a single spark” for him.

The eligible bachelorette explained on Reddit’s “Am I the A——?” forum that it’s been “so hard to find a flame worth pursuing” during her dating experiences, including her most recent dates with a 27-year-old man.

“To be honest, I’m 23, and I think I’m fairly attractive and don’t have any issue getting dates,” she wrote. “I’ve also been through enough dating dynamics to know that I crave intensity and depth.”

“I’ve been on two dates with this guy, and things have been easy so far. He comforts and reassures me when I need it, is more emotionally intelligent than most men I know, yet I don‘t feel a single spark,” she continued.

She then described him as more of a close friend than a romantic interest.

“I think he senses it on his end too, so we had the talk today, and I’ve decided to not continue seeing him, explaining to him the lack of chemistry on my end,” she said, before asking, “At what point does one converge from seeking chemistry to compatibility and settle for security and safety?”

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She admitted she “always” doesn’t have chemistry with the “nice ones,” but that her relationships with chemistry have all “ended badly” for her.

Wanting outside opinions on her dating past and future, the woman asked her fellow Redditors, “Am I the a—— for rejecting a perfectly sweet guy just because I feel like we don’t have chemistry?”

“You crave chaos and dysfunction,” one reader replied, while another Redditor commented, “Never ‘settle,’ but you need to examine if the chemistry you enjoy is the result of negativity, friction, or conflict that ignites that spark. If so, you‘re gonna have a hard-ass romantic life.”

A third person suggested, “If every time you’ve chosen a partner based on chemistry hasn’t worked out, maybe it’s time to try something different?“

“How exactly do you define chemistry? A feeling of passion? Were you not sexually attracted to this guy?” that person added. “Chemistry is fleeting, it’s an emotional or physiological response that feels exciting but as you’ve mentioned, it doesn’t mean a relationship will be healthy or even good.”