‘Bachelorette’ alum says you should talk money on a date — Here’s why

There’s great conversation, the sparks are flying, and then you’re handed the bill. The next question in the back of your mind: how do they handle their money?

It can be an uncomfortable subject and one that some steer away from. But, former “Bachelorette” star, Trading Secrets host, and financial expert Jason Tartick believes that bringing up money on a first date is more than appropriate, as long as it’s approached the right way — without shaming.

Tartick recently teamed up with a FinTech company to bring financial conversations to the forefront of dating, and he isn’t shying away from tough questions. On August 14, he hosted Chime’s speed dating event in New York City, where he shared some lessons he’s learned about financial transparency.

At sixteen years old, Tartick’s grandfather sat him down for a very candid conversation. He learned that his grandfather was taken advantage of by a financial advisor and lost about half of his wealth. He told Tartick, “I’m going to teach you finances because in this world, people will lie, they will deceive, but numbers never lie.” From that moment on, Tartick was always fascinated by how numbers work.

After appearing on Season 14 of “The Bachelorette”, Tartick built a substantial social media following, started a podcast that explores the taboos around money and careers, and went on to author two books, “Talk Money to Me” and “The Restart Roadmap.” He said that teaming up with Chime, known for its fee-free online banking, perfectly aligned with his values.

“When we discuss anything related to money, we arm ourselves… what we need to do with these conversations is dismantle and disarm. I don’t think date one, date two, we need to be swinging for the fences with ‘What’s your income?’, ‘What’s your credit score?’,” he explained.

Rather than diving into money talk headfirst, Tartick suggests asking money-related questions that are fun, almost-sexy, and “not so intense.” One example: How would you spend a million dollars in 24 hours? Creative ideas like these are a great way to learn about a person’s relationship with money.

When asked about how Gen Z is approaching dating in this economy, Tartick cited Chime’s “Banking on Love” survey, which highlights how financial expectations have evolved across generations. According to Tartick, “costs impact everything — our earnings, our spending, and even the way we choose to date.”

He noted that 74% of singles surveyed said that rising costs are materially impacting their dating lives. Of that group, 31% them said they have actually cancelled dates due to the costs. Evolving gender roles are also at play. Nearly half of men believe that men should pay for all of a date, and only about a third of women agree. Tartick’s advice: Skip pricey dinners and expensive cocktails.

Opt for a walk through the park, consider a hike, or find a free or discounted museum. Another option is to jump on a FaceTime call first to find out if there is a spark before any dollars are spent. Tartick even has a friend who planned dinner dates, but started with a stroll through the park to see if there was a spark before sitting down. With the right connection, the conversation matters more than the setting.

“We’re also seeing with Gen Z a little bit of a shift with their ability and desire to communicate the truth when it comes to finances,” Tartick revealed. He noted that most Millennials and Gen Zers actually find it attractive when someone is up front about their income, but flaunting wealth can be a dealbreaker.

Tartick doesn’t believe it’s a “red flag” if someone lacks financial acumen, has a bad credit score, low earnings, or is even in debt. “That’s not the problem. We know the majority of Americans have that problem in some capacity. The big issue to me, the big red flag, is when someone deliberately lies…”

He also pointed out that there is a correlation between people who lie about their finances and then lie about other areas of their lives. One 2021 study revealed that at least one person is committing financial infidelity in 43% of married and cohabitating couples — an issue that can lead to divorce.

About 33% of Chime’s respondents also considered it a turn-off when someone is overspending, and 26% said they get a ‘financial ick’ from stinginess. “We’re seeing this generational shift where people are like, ‘We find both a turn-off… We don’t want to overspend and be praised, and we don’t want to spend below our means and think we can get away with it. We just want honesty,” he stressed.

If Tartick has any advice for the Zoomers navigating the dating pool and feeling financial pressure, it’s to remember that Gen Z is projected to be the wealthiest generation by 2040. “Be smart and be open now, because you know the future is bright for the wealth of this generation.”

Dating and settling down might feel expensive, but wages are growing, and opportunities for earning through social media, commerce, and technology have skyrocketed. Companies like Chime also empower users with a range of financial tools, making it easier for people to take control of their finances and invest in what truly matters — building meaningful connections.

“Stay true to this concept of ‘if we talk about it, we can actually connect with intention as opposed to consumption, which is going to put us all in a healthier, happier, and wealthier state,” Tartick advised.